Saturday, January 24, 2009

A trip to the Vets

I don’t like to say it but I think my mum has a sadistic streak. I wrote about it before, some time ago when I first started doing my blog.

Whenever I’m poorly, she takes me to this awful place called THE VETS It’s a horrible place where a nasty man in a white coat plonks me on a cold, slippery, metal table and then starts prodding and poking my orifices. She usually only takes me there when I’m ill. When I’m so ill I can’t bear all the prodding and poking. It’s downright cruel.

Well, yesterday she took me there even though I wasn’t ill, and I suddenly remembered why. It always happens around the same time every year, and visions of great big needles danced in my head and I thought “NO WAY. NOT THIS TIME. OH NO!” This is me looking shocked:

So, when mum parked outside the Vets and asked me to jump out of the car I decided to roll on my back. That didn’t quite work – she simply picked me up out of the car, plonked me on my feet and attached the lead to my collar. In desperation, I rolled on my back again. She started gnashing her teeth at that point and saying, “You little bugger. Get up!” I could tell I was getting her mad up so I employed another tactic. I started wagging my tail frantically and looking as sweet as I could, still on my back in submissive pose – it gets her every time. She’s a sucker for it – the waggy tail. She started giggling and saying “Come on, GET UP!” but she was laughing so I knew I was winning.

She pulled the lead, saying, “Come on Henry. Come on boy. Let’s go for a walk” in her bright “Let’s have fun!” voice. I knew she thought she could fool me. Well, mum, I wasn’t born yesterday. We were outside the bloody Vets for goodness’ sake. Does she think I’m thick? I remained on my back, wagging my tail and looking cute. She dragged me a few feet, but had started to get an audience at that juncture.

That’s when she simply picked me up and marched me inside. Bummer! I’d forgotten that I was tiny. I wished I was a Great Dane or a Rotty. She couldn’t have swept me up under her arm if I’d been a Rotty could she? All the folks in the Vets were laughing, but their poor pooches weren’t. They all looked petrified. They were all shaking and shivering with fear. Including me.

About five hours later (everything takes an age in France) I’d been prodded, poked and then injected with these huge – nay – HUMONGOUS needles. It was so painful. Honest. I’m sure it was. I can’t really remember to be fair because it happened so fast. But I’m sure it hurt. It must have. Then mum had the cheek to say, “Don't look at me like that. It’s for your own good sweetheart”. FOR MY OWN GOOD? WHY? WHY IS HAVING ME LIBERALLY PUNCTURED WITH NEEDLES A GOOD THING? WHY? I tell you. She’s downright cruel.

Anyway I was thoroughly spoiled yesterday evening and Uncle Hugh gave me lots of ‘Fingers of Fun’

Then I felt a bit sleepy.

This morning I felt a bit sore.


Lee said...

Love the shocked ears!
You can keep the injections, though.

Lee said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Indrayani aka, Indi! said...

Awww. I envy you Henry..I wish I had some tricks like that I could loook cute when needed...
Somehow I have no defense against my mom's wrath...
And trust her, the needles are for your good.
We all want you fit and fine now..
Loved your pics!

tam said...

Awww Henry you poor chap-but it really is for your won good! I hope you have a good weekend!~Smiles~Tam!

A Woman Of No Importance said...

Poor little pooch, but the vets is a necessary evil, Henry. Your mum only has your best interests at heart...but I can almost hear her laughing at your crazydog antics!

Dumdad said...

Poor old Henry. Next time bite the vet, that'll make you feel better.

Parisgirl said...

Needles sore or head sore or both? Perhaps your mum could give you a hair of the dog (groan!)

detroit dog said...

Henry, that is your shocked look? It looks to me that you are really pissed off. Scary!

Quasar loves the vet, practically drags me in through the back door and up the hallway to the main room. He can't wait to meet all the other dogs. Silly.

I do love the photo of you giving Mr. Bush "a raspberry." Too funny.

Stubby said...

Mom is loving all the cute pictures of you Henry. You are such a charmer!
I do not like going to the vets either, but I do like the car ride to get there. Mom tries tricking me too, but just like you, I wasn't born yesterday.
The worst parts for me about going to the vets are 1) getting on the scale because it lies and 2) having the doctor poke around in my mouth. Nothing but food is allowed in my mouth!

Irish Gumbo said...

Greta shocked look, Henry! So sorry about the needles, ouchy ouch. It does suck to have go through that, even us grown up humans get it occasionally. And I am with you on the orifice prodding: things I would rather do without!

Still, Mum is looking out for you. Better to get a little bit hurt now to avoid a lot of sick later on. Chin up!

Frankie Furter said...

Hi Henry, Baron was a short haired one that lived here before me. He had a grrreat Vet trick. He always peed on him. he he he I have not tired it...yet.
Hey, Detroit Dog my mom says to tell you that about 3 score ago, she lived at 13131 Cloverlawn Ave.. Do you know that area??? She is like an elephant,I think, to remember that address after all this time. She even remembers the phone number.
I keep forgetting to tell you that I love that Bush Raspberry. I am glad that he is gone, too. Heck his dogs were not even nice.
Hope you feel better soon. Just don't let them know it. Play that owie for all its worth. You may even get some cheese to go along with the finger treats. he he he

misty and poppy bichon said...

I guess you have to get those annual jabs because you go to stay with lots of dogs. Mummy decided a long time ago that annual boosters did more harm than good and aren't we glad about that. She read a book by Martin Goldstein, an American vet who talked about the damage done by these multiple vaccines.

Hurrah hurrah we don't have to have this done, although we do have to have the Rabies top-up once a year so our passports are up to date. We have photos on it and everything.

Poor Henry.

mwah X

French Fancy said...

Braja said...

Oh Henry you poor wee thing! I laughed and laughed at this: "...Bummer! I’d forgotten that I was tiny." You are hilarious. But it *is* for your own good, so don't be too hard on your mum :) Glad you got those fingers of fun...jeez, I'd like a coupla them! That last photo was reeeeeaaaaaaly sweet :)))

LadyFi said...

Oh hilarious! Well, not really - I also have a real phobia of needles. In fact, my ears look as shocked as yours - but with less hair...

Henry the Dog said...

Lee - no, they're not much fun.

Indi - but you're not a dog, so it's not so easy to look cute. Saying that. I think you're a cute chick (Henry winks)

Tam & Woman of NI - EVERYONE keeps saying that, even mum and Uncle Hugh, but it doesn't FEEL as if it's doing me good when I'm being pierced:)

Dumdad - yes I just might bite the bugger next time!

Parisgirl - BOTH! Ha ha - hair of dog - ha ha ha xxx

Detroit - both shocked and pissed off actually. Quasar loves the vets? CRAZY guy. Yeah, mum loved the raspberry one - wasn't rehearsed:)

Stubby - you are so funny - I agree those scales are terrible liars aren't they? I reckon lots of women would agree with you;)

Irish - I don't mind sick. I get spoiled rotten when I'm sick. Mum says she's lovin' your posts but I don't get 'em and she won't let me leave comments like "I don't get this, Irish, do you want to play fetch instead?" Mum says that sometimes, some posts shouldn't have little dog comments on them. Spoilsport!

Frankie - now that's an idea. If I peed on him mum might not take me back there.

Misty & Poppy - NO NO NO, I'm covering my ears and singing "La la la la" I don't want to hear about the vaccine thing - mum has no choice...."La la la la". YOU HAVE PHOTOS ON YOUR PASSPORTS??? How cool is that? Perhaps mum will put one on mine now that she has a camera. Bisous.

French Fancy - (Henry puts paws over eyes) no not looking. I am NOT copying and pasting that link. No no no.......mum will only stress loads.....and me too....

Braja - I often forget that I'm tiny. I guess it's 'cause I'm big inside. That last photo is of me curled up on mum's sofa. I always nick her place when she pops to the loo. Then when she tries to move me so that she can sit down I roll over on my back and look all submissive and cute, so she genrally leaves me where I am and goes and sits on Uncle Hugh's sofa. She is so easy to manipulate, it's scary.

Lady Fi - only a nutcase would like needles n'est-ce pas???

Henry the Dog said...

French Fancy - have you had gales today in your part of France? We've had awful weather and the electricity keeps going off. It's a right painxxxx

~Marie~ said...

Oh Henry! Your mum is right. Those shots will help you not get terribly sick, so it really is for the best.

Peanut really loves his vet, and will follow the vet where ever they are going. And I also think it's because they have pockets full of treats.

Peanut usually has to get an antihistamine shot before his yearly shots, because if not he gets all lumpy.

French Fancy said...

We had those gales yesterday - poor little Misty was nearly knocked over going OTP (on the paper). She's the dainty one; Pop is more like 'sturdy girl'. Today we've had snow which has now turned to slush.

Re the photos - we thought it would be a bit of fun and seems to give the people who work in the little pet passport room at Calais a laugh.


Irish Gumbo said...

Henry, you really are a very sweet dog, you know that? Tell Mum I said thank you so much for reading, very pleased she likes the posts!

I will say, though, there are days where a few rounds of fetch and a roll in the grass would be most welcome. Anytime, my friend!

Diane said...

You are so cute, my boy! And funny. And right... if you were bigger, your mum would've been screwed. My boy is about 75lbs and it's rather difficult to get him to do anything he doesn't want to do. I have to put on my 'mean mommy' voice (which I hate) and he'll usually move then, but he drags himself along as if he's off to the gallows. Pitiful, he is.

Hope the soreness wears off soon, love! xo

Henry the Dog said...

Marie - if my vet had a pocket full of treats I'd follow him too:)
That lumpy business sounds scary. Hope it doesn't happen to me!

FFancy - poor little Misty. Hope she's not too traumatised. We had a bit of snow too. The electric has been going on and off all day, it's been hellish trying to do stuff on the internet:( I think mum has decided to get a photo of me stuck on my passport. That's SO funny:)

Irish - yes, mum is a big fan of yours. She thinks you write really well. Mum 'lurks' on quite a few blogs like yours but never comments. She's shy. I think you're dead clever, but I don't understand half of what you write. Mum understands more than I do, but she ought to, she's human. Talking about that 'fetch' business - why not?

Diane - mum used to have a big black lab and she said he was NOT easy to manipulate:) So she can sympathise, I think xxx

Temple said...

Oh, poor Henry! But you look more adorable than ever (if that is possible). Lola actually LOVES going to see her vet...I'm pretty sure it's because they give her the run of the place while she is's more of a social outing for her than anything :)

Mickle in NZ said...

Oh Henry, hope you're feeling better now, I'm sure the fingers of fun helped.

That's a really nasty storm you've got there. I've just been reading the scary news stories. Stay inside and keep safe - you could always pretend you're Zebbycat and sleep through it.

Huggles, xxx

J Cosmo Newbery said...

Henry, really! The things you do for a 'finger of fun'!

Simplicity said...

Hi Henry! And Henry's Mum! I love the photos! Are they from the new digital camera? I'm quite sure the needle hurt you poor muffin. :( but it's just have to remember that it's because your mum wants to keep you in her life as long as she can! Hugs!

lady jicky said...

G'day Mate, its me Kenzo . Yeah , I took a couple of typing lessons and here I am!
SNAP Mate!!!! I went to the darn VET too!!! Bloody Mothers.
I have a hernia and she went into a spin! Well the Vet (did not have a white coat on - too 'cool' for that ) said it was OK and will either fix itself or he can fix it when I get de-sexed - what the hell is that Henry?
I tell you - no injection for me (two weeks time ) but the way he put that thermomter in - hell Mum thought it was going to disappear! I want to sue that guy - what a weirdo!
Henry -take it easy - in two weeks I guess I will understand what a "injection" is. Hey - do you have heartworm problems in Europe? We do - again the famous "in two weeks time" I think its a tablet - what is that too??

Henry the Dog said...

Temple - thank you so much. But it's hard being adorable sometimes. All that fan mail! I can't imagine ever being happy to go to the Vets no matter what:)

Mickle - do you get Euro news in NZ? Yes, it was very bad in parts. Mum was more scared than me (as usual) she HATES wind - perhaps it's because it blows her hair into her lippy. I don't know, but she hates it. We don't normally get any in this part of France, so it was a shock for folk.

J Cosmo - but it's worth it;)

Simplicity - yes mum's being going mad with the digi camera since she bought it. She's like a kid with a new toy. She's camera mad. Uncle Hugh's getting bored now. Perhaps she should take some of him. I'm sure the needle hurt too. It must have:)

KENZO! Hi there young pup. I guess Lady J would have been a bit worried considering what's been happening in her life lately. But I'm sure you're fine. Yes, that bloody thermometer is a tad intrusive isn't it. Just hold your breath next time. As for de-sexed. Well, I've never been through that. All I can say, young pup, is make the most of them whilst you have them - your balls, son, your balls. Between me and you - I have no idea what they're for but I live in hope:):):) Heartworm? No I don't think so. If we do, trust me, mum will have already done something about it. I'm regularly having tablets thrust down my throat, stuff dropped between my shoulder blades and those dreaded injection thingies. Don't worry about the tablets - some are tasty. The ones that aren't - just hack them back up when your mum's not looking:):):)

Blu said...

Oh poor little Henry and you tried so hard to look adorable. Pah, the vets here give you a treat to eat! Looks like Mum has you sussed out!

herhimnbryn said...

Agh Matey!
Don't you hate those bloody needles? I do, but I quite like going to the vet, 'cos it means I get to go in the ute, Yay!

But,once i've got in the door of the Vet's place and I have received all the pats and praise, then I roll on my back and do the cute waggy tail thing. The best part is my Mum can't pick me up. I know then she'll have to get a doggy treat out of her pocket to get me into the room of doom. Works everytime!

love Bryn x

Mickle in NZ said...

Hi Henry - we get all sorts of news here. Plus there is always the BBC website.

I was in London for the big October 1987 storm. Woke up during the night thinking "its a bit windy, just like a good Wellington southerly" The next morning I looked out the window - the neighbour's garage had fallen down, right into their back garden where they made their dogs leap over things and walk around sticks stuck in the ground. I thought sticks were for catching!

Henry the Dog said...

Blu - wish the Vets here gave treats. No luck. Hardly rocket science is it? Thing is, mum tried treats, but I've got her sussed, never mind the other way around.

Bryn - lucky you, you have size on your side. Haven't you sussed your mum out by now;)

Mickle - HA HA HA - mum is laughing so much "a bit windy", yeah, only the most famous storm ever in the UK.....:):):) Mum was in Oz when that happened, so she missed it xx

SSQuo said...

Its for your own good dear even though you dont believe it. YOu did Fingers of Fun though! :)

Btw, you are becoming quite the star on the blog world, has fame gone to your head as yet? More importantly, how has it changed you my friend?

We the people would love to hear from the little star!

Henry the Dog said...

SSQuo - No, fame hasn't gone to my head - as if! Now excuse me, must rush, have to go to tea with Brad & Angelina, then it's off for cocktails with Madge - you know, Madonna xxxxx